31: Three reasons why people don’t achieve their goals

As we find ourselves halfway through the year, many of us start to reflect on the goals we set back in January. Remember those resolutions you were so excited about? This is the time when many people start questioning why they haven’t made the progress they expected.

Facing Mid-Year Goal Frustrations

It’s easy to feel a wave of discouragement as the months roll by. You set goals with such enthusiasm and determination, only to find yourself stuck or sidetracked as life’s demands take over. You might be asking yourself, “Why can’t I just stick to my goals?”

Today, we’re going to explore some of the reasons why achieving our goals can be so challenging. 

Find the full transcript for this episode and other resources for women leaders at womenleadersunlimited.com/31

Juanita is a Professional and Personal Mentor for Women Leaders.

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Transcript

Reason 1: Questioning the Purpose of Goals

Let’s start with a big one: you begin to ask yourself, “Why am I even bothering to set these goals?” It’s a question that creeps in, especially when progress stalls or setbacks arise. You might start to wonder if all the effort is worth it, especially when juggling other responsibilities.

We’ve all been there, questioning the point of it all when the going gets tough. It’s easy to lose sight of why you set those goals in the first place, particularly if immediate results aren’t visible. But it’s important to remember that this questioning phase is a natural part of the process. It’s the brain's way of trying to protect you from discomfort and failure.

However, this questioning can lead to a cycle of doubt. You start second-guessing your decisions, and soon enough, those goals that once seemed so clear and attainable begin to blur. You might even start to believe that perhaps you set your sights too high.

This self-doubt can lead to abandoning goals altogether. You may find yourself thinking that maybe it’s not meant to be, and that can be discouraging. But remember, dissatisfaction with your current state can be a powerful motivator. It’s a sign that you’re ready for growth, even if the path forward isn’t clear just yet.

Reason 2: Misalignment with Personal Values

Another common barrier is the misalignment between your goals and your personal values. Have you ever set a goal that, on the surface, seemed like the right move, but deep down, didn’t feel quite right? It might be because the goal isn’t aligned with your core values.

For example, you might set a career goal of climbing the corporate ladder, believing it will bring success and fulfillment. But if you value work-life balance and freedom, this goal might conflict with your personal values, leading to internal tension.

When your goals are not in harmony with your values, you’re more likely to encounter resistance. You may struggle to take action or find that achieving the goal doesn’t bring the satisfaction you anticipated. This disconnect can be disheartening and often leads to abandoning the goal.

It’s crucial to recognize that your values are the foundation of your motivation. When your goals align with your values, you’ll find it easier to stay committed and passionate. But when there’s a conflict, motivation wanes, and progress becomes challenging.

Reason 3: Pursuing Goals That Aren’t Yours

This leads us to the third reason: pursuing goals that aren’t truly yours. Have you ever found yourself chasing a dream because someone else wanted it for you? Maybe it was a parent’s wish, a partner’s expectation, or society’s definition of success.

It’s easy to fall into this trap because we naturally want to please those around us. We seek harmony in our relationships and often try to live up to external expectations. But when you’re working towards someone else’s dream, it can feel like you’re carrying a burden rather than following your passion.

The issue arises when these external goals overshadow your own desires. You might find yourself working tirelessly towards something that doesn’t ignite your passion, leading to burnout and frustration. Without that inner fire, motivation dwindles, and progress halts.

Think about it: have you ever pursued a goal only to realize it wasn’t what you truly wanted? It’s a common experience and can leave you feeling unfulfilled, even if you achieve what you set out to do. Your goals should reflect your unique aspirations and values, not just what others expect of you.

Reflecting on These Barriers

So, as we explore these barriers today, take a moment to reflect on your own experiences. Have you questioned the purpose of your goals? Are they aligned with your values? Are you pursuing goals that are truly yours? These are important questions to consider as we move forward.

Recognizing these barriers is the first step in understanding why you might feel stuck or discouraged. It's not about blaming yourself or feeling guilty; it’s about gaining insight into what might be holding you back. Understanding these reasons can empower you to make more intentional choices moving forward.

Looking Ahead

In our next episode, we’ll dive into more reasons why goals can be elusive and start exploring strategies to overcome these challenges. Remember, identifying these barriers is just the beginning. Together, we’ll work towards solutions that empower you to achieve your dreams.